The following is an excerpt from a chapter of the book I wrote for my class last semester. It relates to last week's post except it goes more into how negativity affects those around you, not just yourself!
Negative words, comments, or people, the best things to avoid in life. I wish I could take all of the day-ruiners and shove their words in a cauldron of searing flames, never to be witnessed by the ears of the positive. Just who do those people think they are? Waltzing in and telling you your shoes don't match, saying you’re doing your job poorly, telling you that you suck, complaining about the littlest thing, always in a fight. You know that person. As soon as something like that comes out of someone’s mouth I could scream! I wish these people would just stop wasting their time.
It’s these people that I have learned to avoid in life because their words infect my attitude which I work so hard to protect. My dog is a perfect example of how negativity diffuses into others. When I come into my house after a wonderful day, usually dancing or singing, but always smiling, Meka comes running over to me wagging her tail, dying to share in the good time. But once in a while, after a stressful day, I may enter the house angrily. I slam the door, stub my toe, yell out a curse word, and Meka knows it is not her place to be happy. She shrugs, puts her tail timidly between her legs, and avoids eye contact. She lays down solitarily, avoiding the negative energy while feeling upset herself. Meka senses the stress, and responds in a negative manner. In the same way, when someone is stressed or is going out of their way to be negative, we sense it, it infects us, and never does this negativity make us feel good.
People tend to stress out about minor problems. They don't have enough money, they’re never going to be able to finish their paper, they’re in a fight with their friend, they are too busy this week. There are people who, every time you see them, have something to complain about. Sometimes their problems are valid, and most problems are. I always try to take the time to understand the source of the complaints, what in there life makes this seem like the world is ending? It is important to be empathetic. But every once and a while there are negative people who just need to take a step back and realize that things aren’t so bad. Your life is not over because you missed your alarm and didn’t get to have a cup of coffee. In fact, you are most likely going to survive the day without consequence. Sometimes people don’t realize that complaining and focusing too much on the little things that get them down gets them no where. Sometimes they don't realize how much their attitude affects those around them.
Being negative towards others is one of the worst negative offenses (aside from being negative towards yourself!). When someone rudely shuts down my opinions, remarks that something is “stupid,” criticizes without reason, or talks badly of someone else-- I just feel DOWN. I am guilty of these things too, I am human too, but I have begun to recognize how markedly they alter the positive aura of the room. I have learned to take a step back before filling the ears of my friends with my problems, before making unnecessary negative comments, and before judging people, beliefs, or situations... and I am strong enough to admit that I am still learning. I am not perfect and may still slip negativity into conversation, but at the very least, I am mindful of it. It is important for everyone to be mindful of their negativity and how dangerously contagious it is. It is also important to know when to avoid negativity when it is radiating off of others, sometimes you have to recognize when you have caught someone's negativity and become immune at once! Then you are one step closer to a longer life!
